Author Archives: equestrianreality

Eventing Adventures – Torrential Tattersalls!

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So this weekend was really one of ups and downs. On Friday Merlot 🍷🐴left for her new home in the UK. Thanks to everyone who asked if I was ok – I am as sometimes you have to make tough decisions but when its for the right reason it’s the right decision. She has gone to a wonderful person and a great home and I wish them the very best success together.

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More Things I learned While Eventing

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Photo by Equus Pix

Last week, after a two year break I did two events in four days on my unicorn moving up a level since our last time out in 2017. It was great fun but as usual we learned a few things along the way….

  • If you are going to drive 3 + hours each way to an event bring a friend.

 

  • If you still like someone after six or more hours together in a car, you are definitely friends

 

  • When adding your route to a maps app make sure ‘avoid motorways’ is unticked

 

  • It doesn’t matter how many lists you make you will always forget something

 

  • However many studs you think you need, buy twice that many

 

  • It is not just horses who need electrolytes and water – drink water if you don’t want to look like a raisin the next day

 

  • never underestimate how terrifying it can be if a flower almost touches your horses leg in a dressage test

 

  • The camera adds ten pounds to the rider and takes at least 10cm off the height of a fence. The giant wooden chasm you had to jump over in real life will always look up to your knee in photos.

 

  • if you ask if you should bring a waterproof rug and your friends says ‘No, it wont rain’ – it will definitely rain. It will rain a lot

 

  • The only thing more of a pain in the swiss than returning from XC soaked to your knickers is trying to wrangle studs out of the feet of a horse who is determined to eat grass in torrential rain

 

  • The flimsier your footwear the more times a horse will try and stand on you with studs in

 

  • When packing spare clothes include socks and underwear unless you like driving home with a wet ass.

 

  • Nothing feels as good as a warm and dry change of clothes after getting soaked.

 

  • When changing in your horsebox make sure your horse cant nip your bum.

 

  • Riders going through adrenaline crash who have not eaten in about six hours do not make healthy food choices.

 

  • When it comes to travelling horses while noise is a concern, silence is suspicious.

 

  • It doesn’t matter how neat and organised your jeep was on the way there, on the way home it will be a chaotic mess of mud / sweat / hair covered stuff that no longer even fits

 

  • Nothing that leaves home white comes home white

 

  • It doesn’t matter how many times you swear you will, no one is every fresh enough after getting home to clear out the horsebox or jeep the same evening when they get home

 

  • It doesn’t matter how many times you swear you will clean out the horsebox and jeep the next day, it will be at least three days later.

 

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Things All Equestrians Do

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  • Ignore excruciating and ongoing pain and stiffness blaming lack of fitness / getting old / an old injury but call the physio, vet and backman at the first sign of mild discomfort in the horse

 

  • Keep horses teeth maintained twice yearly but avoid our own dentist unless the dental pain is so bad that it can’t be cured by whiskey and / or difene

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Product Review – Janni Bars Leather Balm

 

I love doing product reviews. I am a big fan of Janni Bars already – they are a local small company who specialise in environmentally friendly and plastic free beauty products for humans, horses and dogs.

I currently use several of their bars already – the after work bar to bathe my horses after a hard work session, the bright white shampoo bar for washing their white legs before a show and the Avocado Scrub soap on my hands. I also love the mojito scrub for my shower – it smells incredible!

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BACK to Basics

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I have always had a ‘bad back’ for lack of a better expression. I remember as a child my mother telling me to stand straight, shoulders back and to be honest I just couldn’t. It never did me any great harm and I managed to learn to ride starting aged ten but over the years ‘sit up’ was ringing in my ears. I had an accident about 15 years ago. I was working leading treks and a pony kicked my horse and my horse bolted under a tree, I took a branch to the neck and was bent back and the cantle of the saddle went into my back. I was xrayed and as there was no structural damage I was given anti inflammatories and sent on my way. It was an accident pure and simple and anyone who knows me knows my hatred of our compensation culture – there is no blame there, I worked with horses I hurt myself, that’s life. I had another fall off my mare where her back legs slipped as she jumped and I went head first into the ground causing a concussion and vertabrea damage in my neck which made for some interesting weeks of being fairly out of it. I found an excellent chiropractor at the time who helped greatly with my neck diagnosed a mild scoliosis in my back ( I was never checked for it in school). This went some way to explaining my one sidedness and the fact that I have always ridden with my left stirrup at least one hole longer than my right! This man went back to his native country so I did nothing until about ten years ago I couldn’t put weight onto one leg without pain and a friend dragged me down to a spinologist in Carlow. That man changed my life and got me mobile again through cranio sacral therapy and manipulation.

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Whatever you choose to feed will grow

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Anxiety, fear, competition nerves, general nerves, fear of failure and awareness of vulnerability and the possibility of physical injury. Ever felt like this? Ever felt it before you got on a horse or even before you got to the yard or on the drive to a competition? Of course you have. Ever felt physical symptoms? Stomach ache, diarrohea, vomiting or even just sweaty palms and the little flutter in your chest? I bet you have.

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We don’t have to be amazing at this

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This is something I found myself speaking a lot about last week in person and online. I am, like many others, an amateur rider. Horses are not in my family background and much as they are what I live for, I had neither the talent, the support or the funds to be a professional at this sport. Thankfully I am good enough at other things to manage to be gainfully employed doing them which in turn allows me to enjoy horses which are my true passion in life.

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People You Will Meet in The Dressage Warmup

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Needs a sat nav

Rider with no concept of basic rules of the school usually riding along naval grazing while others have to swerve around them. Will have ‘left hand to left hand’ hissed at them at least ten times in the warm up but probably won’t even notice as they almost crush your knee against the wall.

 

Randomer getting a lesson

Will spend the entire time in the warm up arena riding a twenty metre circle while getting a lesson off someone. Shoots glaring looks at anyone who dares to enter said circle.

 

The Diva

To find them just follow the histrionic echoes of their tone of dissatisfaction that waft across the warm up. Will literally act as if their Olympic effort has been derailed if they realise a novice class is running ten minutes behind when they are ready to go in. Usually accompanied by a minion. Cannot possibly warm up at any level without the minion applying at least six white boots.

 

The Minion

Groom / partner / parent demoted to general dogsbody dominated to the point where they have no opinion of their own and just live to serve and hope they get out alive at the end of the event.

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Winter Finals, here we come!

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Sunday was quite simply, an experience. I headed off with two friends to our first Dressage Ireland competition of the season. They were keen to qualify for Cavan,  I just needed three more scores myself and one wanted to test drive her new lorry so we thought why not and headed off out West to County Clare to compete in the North Munster region.

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Sit in Row 24 and Keep Off The Floor!

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Positive position changes! Before (below) and after (above) 

Fresh after our Roland Tong clinic on Friday a couple of weeks back, Sammy was rather intrigued at being put back into the horsebox on Saturday. “Jumps Sammy” I promised as I bribed him up the ramp with a haylage net. We set off for Killossery for the Sarah Ennis eventing clinic but ground to a halt at the M50 on ramp which pretty much resembled a car park. I rang the venue who rather than saying oh well go home, said take your time we will make it work in another session which was really accommodating of them. We arrived an hour later to find the clinic had it’s own delays but we were ready to join a group of four other riders and get going in the indoor.

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